Day 23: Empty Room Vlog

Day 23: Something you love to watch on youtube (or better yet a youtube video of yourself)

Maybe-a-bag-over-my-head-would-have-been-better-vlog.

Phase just-before-they-put-the-new-carpet-in. I look like a complete fool, I sound awful, and I need to shed some pounds. By the way, I don't have a Texan accent. I have lived in Texas for 17 years, almost 18, did you know that? I'm 23, almost 24. Amazing, isn't it? (I actually have no idea what accent I have, aside from American, really. Plain? Boring? Yeah, really.)

I'm typing this while I'm waiting for the video to upload from my Evo, which has a much better video quality than my webcam ever will.

I apologize for my amateur video skills, but my video ended up sideways, and I had to edit it to make it vertical. So it looks strange, but here it is. Voila!



It's amazing, I really don't say much in my vlogs, but they tend to have really good traffic. I guess people like to laugh at the way I talk? =/ OK it's a little embarrassing, after watching myself talk, and I hate it, but it's the way I talk! *sigh*

My sister has one of my favorite high school teachers. He asked her on the first day of school how I was doing, even though he didn't talk really to any of the other students, and didn't ask how she was. I love him. He's awesome. She was a little embarrassed I think. She came home and told us about it over dinner yesterday though, and laughed, so it must not have been too bad.

It's weird to watch everyone go back to school, while I'm not. It's my first semester to not go back to school. I've been busy with my room, and I need to find out what the next step to licensure is. Apparently, Google Chrome doesn't think licensure is a word, but it is. The video is only half loaded. Wow. Either I type fast or the video is downloading slowly. It could be both.

It's still heatwaving here in Texas. Like over 100 degrees Fahrenheit every day since the beginning of June or so. It's almost September. WTF Mother Nature, don't you love us? We're now #2 for the number of days above 100 degrees in a single summer, and #2 for consecutive days- would have been #1 had it not been for a single day where we got a few clouds, and only reached 97. Mother Nature teased us. Tortured us, with the thought that we'd get a nice day....WRONG. Then she laughed and gave us more hundred degree days. We're second in both categories to the year 1980. I wasn't born yet. *faint*

Pulling up the carpet has kicked up so much dust that it's bothering my eyes and making me sneeze. At least I didn't sneeze during my vlog. I would have re-recorded it though. That's how I roll. It took 3 times to get it to where I didn't have as much of a double chin. I still have one, but I guess if I have one, I have one. Blah.

I love talking to people on twitter. I'm learning so many new things. I must have a macaron. Does someone have a good recipe? Send it to me at perpetuallyashley (at) gmail (dot) com. See how I avoid spammers?

Anyone who has made it this far, hats off to ya. That means you actually read the content of a blog. Some people don't, and they are starting to wear me thin. You know, the ones that leave drive-by comments "Found you on XYZ hop, would love it if you visited my blog at [blogname]" and possibly follow you but never return? I feel cheated. If they do come back, I feel comforted, but the ones that just follow because that's what the rules say, I don't like that.

88%. Almost there. If you want to check them out, I have 2 other vlogs. They are quite a while back in my archive, but they are pretty popular too, so you may be able to find them at the bottom of my page, below all the blog hop buttons. Genius me, I forgot the screen is supposed to go across, not up and down. Murphy's Law! I have to enter that after publishing as a tag if I do, because it has an apostrophe in it. Gotta love Blogger.....

Huzzah!!

The Simple Dude

The shout out is in the title, yo, but in case you don't know who he is, or haven't seen his site before, you can find Simple Dude in a Complex World here, and you can find his book here. There's even better news- the book is uber cheap- $1.99 to be exact. That means for less than $2US you can learn how to make your own blog more popular (if it isn't already)!

Credit

Now, when I started out, to be honest, I thought that none of the stuff in there would be helpful for increasing readership, to be honest. I was like, "ok, this dude started out with more readers than I have JUST started getting..." because he talks about having hundreds of readers in the beginning. So maybe my contents need some revision. You know what, though? After reading on, I realized, I'm doing this for myself....and I'm awfully wordy anyway. I always have been!

Then I got to it. The meat of it. What I was looking for. The tips. You know what? The tips he mentioned are the ones that have increased my readership five-fold in the past two months (seriously). But you know what? I'm not going to mention it. You know why? I think it's a good book, and worth the $1.99. You can read it online even! It's not something that you need to spend days or even hours reading, and seriously, the tips are helpful. I've used them. Some of them without knowing it. Some of them might be helpful to you, if you're just starting out.

What's even better is that the tips are simple. Plain and simple. What would you expect from a guy whose moniker is "The Simple Dude"? Simplicity. He puts it out there, and makes it so easy to understand. Seriously, I encourage you to get it. It's so easy to get, and it's less than a caramel mocha at Starbucks (or whatever you drink), cheaper than most of the food you buy, heck, it's cheaper than half a gallon of gas in some places, and it's almost certain to help you if you need help stepping into the blogging world.

Some of you may have tips to add for me (if you do, I don't mind, because I'm really wanting to know how to get more people here, besides being less wordy and adding lots of pictures, because I'm no artist). After all, there are some larger bloggers than me out there reading my blog (you know who you are- don't hide), and there are some smaller bloggers and/or people who don't blog at all (hi dad, Courtney- why the heck did you view my blog 12 times yesterday??, mom).

All in all, it starts out scaring you with no tips, making you think "omg, I already failed by not starting out with hundreds of readers...oh, I'm a loser, I can't draw," but then adds tips in about halfway that make you rethink your format. I could put more pictures in, such as Mona Lisa:

I'm just here because people like pictures, and I like hanging with Ashley.
Nobody owns the copyright for me except da Vinci
This photo of me was found here

I could also insert an image of Starry Night:

I have no purpose here other than I also like hanging with Ashley.
Nobody can claim my copyright other than van Gogh
Why do all these artists have 2 surnames? Ashley should also have 2 surnames.
This image was grabbed from this site.

As you can see, the pictures really lend nothing to my blog. I don't know what photos to add. I could add a photo of me, but I'd lose a lot of viewers unless I photoshopped it, and I don't have photoshop. I am unwilling to be like the chick here and completely ruin my self esteem with a deprecating answer such as the one chosen, so I will forget self-images. I will continue to write.

I have noticed that people did like the one vlog I did. That got a lot of traffic. It was also highly publicized. The other vlog flopped. Badly. Seeing as I am socially awkward, I think my days of vlogging are...very limited, unless I otherwise see a demand for them (which seems unlikely).

I try to improve, I really do. Now that I've got my hands on this book, I have more ideas [ensue evil laughter] {just kidding about the evil part. I really don't have an evil laugh}.

Now, I've really got other things on my mind, but I really promised this book review, and it's a bit later than I had planned on it being. Until the other things on my mind clear, it's gonna be rough on me, blogging and all. If you haven't read my last blog, or if you haven't talked to me especially, you don't know much about what's going on. Here's the DL

I made a mistake at my internship in a rush to get prepared to go out of town, so that I could work on my project while away. A big mistake. I didn't know it until the next day, when I was on my way out the door. I may or may not be losing my internship. I've already been told that I did something wrong, and was sobbing over the phone about it, and I know there's a meeting awaiting me when I return. I've not been able to relax, really. I've not been able to work on my project, either, since I had to clear information out. It's a big embarrassment to me, and could cost me a lot of things, including my internship, I could fail this class and have to extend my graduation by up to 2 semesters. I could lose the chance to graduate under this degree completely, and the chance to work with this degree, even if I do graduate. I could lose the chance for licensure, many things could go wrong.

I don't know exactly what will happen yet. I know the company is going to be fined and face consequences for my mistake. There are other things, minor in comparison, going on as well, but I've just not been able to bring my head to a peaceful level, where I can just enjoy the last little bit of time that I have before my other class starts. I'm too worried, too disheveled. I'm a mess. My future looks like a disaster zone right now. So, in case anyone really is wondering, or cares, that's what's going down.

Deuces

Burning Questions

Today's been one of my overly analytical days. I've been overanalyzing every song I hear.

Unfortunately, I heard the Devil go down to Georgia way too many times (I don't know if my phone was set to "replay classic country" or something, but it kept playing that song)

Why did he go to Georgia? Aren't there many more places to steal souls? And why was he searching on some back country road, carrying a fiddle? Why was it that the only person he could find was some hick named Johnny who happened to beat the shit out of him and his band of demons when playing the fiddle? I just don't get it. No comprendo.

Luckily, Mental Floss is a great website that answers some of my deep, burning questions, like why we drive on the right side of the road, rather than the left, or why those little red wagons we dragged around as kids were called radio flyers. I mean, after all, I have so many burning questions, they all need to be answered!

Then, there are some things in life that can't be answered. For some reason, the university that I am getting my degree from in a month in a half is sending me flyers about undergraduate recruitment. Wait, what? I've received letters from other major universities too, wanting me to transfer my credits. Why, in my last month of college, would I transfer my credits somewhere else? No, I'm staying here! I also got a check for [undisclosed amount] from the university in the mail today. I have no idea why, and I'm checking it out, but it's a bit mind-blowing.

Why must life throw us things like that? Why must life confuse us? Why can't everything be [at least somewhat] straightforward? I mean, I love analyzing things and all, but not all people are cut out for that, man. People just aren't. I can name some right now that should just have things explained in layman's terms.

Then again, there would be no challenges, and yes, I do think there should be some challenge in life. But don't we have enough challenges? Where do we draw the line? I mean, I respect that we should have challenges and work hard for shit, but sometimes, things can't be worked out. We can try, we can work on it as hard as possible, but it's just way too damn hard to work out. Then we're forced to feel like failures because we didn't meet some expectations.

Well, some of us feel like failures. The ones that overachieve. The ones that can't stand to fail. The ones who have to do everything and have to do it right. I hate not meeting expectations. I hate not meeting commitments. There was a commitment I made last month that I made last month that I had to back out of, and I am still beating myself up for it, even though it's been almost a month since I found out I had to back out. I know that it's going to happen in life, but it still feels bad.

Yet I continue to make commitments, because I feel like I have to do so much. I continue to overachieve. I continue to analyze. I must know everything. I must be in control. Everything that's going to be happening next week while I'm not working at my internship? I'm losing sleep over it. I'm wondering how it's all gonna work out. I've got this temptation to call up there every day just to check in. Seriously. And I'm just an intern. What am I going to do when I have to leave? When I have to pass on commitments? When I have to pass on the torch?

I'm really agonizing over this, because it's really nearing that time where I'm gonna have to start wrapping things up. I'm starting my next class July 11. I'll be missing a week worth of hours due to distance from internship. I'll be doing a really heavy duty group project as well as a heavy duty individual paper over the next couple of weeks (hint: don't expect a lot of blogging, unless I feel the need to say something, or have some time when my brain needs a break). On top of that, the other class 4 hours a day 4 days a week and my internship hours. I don't know how I expected myself to do it, but I'll need to kick my ass into high gear now. That means now.

That means I need to stop worrying about round pizza in square boxes, why an antibacterial hand wash would boast that it is waterless, why people would want touch free soap (isn't it to clean your hands? why would it matter if you touched the soap thing if you're cleaning your hands afterward?), why people would want to live a certain lifestyle, why maps are usually square, why things that taste so good are so bad for you, why [insert higher power] would make animals out of meat if he didn't want us to eat them, why most people are right handed (aside from genetics....is there some survival benefit to it?), why we have different seasons, and the like. I could sit here all night and wander and wonder....because my mind is like that.

What kind of things do you wonder about?

Is there anything you wonder about me? [I'm opening myself up to answering any questions. If interested, I may even create a vlog to answer them, because people seem to like vlogs. I'd have to put a time limit on that though, but first I'm gonna put the idea out there and see what I get.]

Tell me something about you!!!

I'm double-jointed in all my fingers except my right thumb.
I was born without tonsils
I know how to read music but cannot play an instrument to save my life
I prefer to dress casually, but most of my closet is business-casual due to my internship
I have a love affair with dark chocolate. I'm biased against other types of chocolate because they're too milky.
I'm not prejudiced, I hate everyone just the same. (just kidding- if anything, I love everyone)
I love to wear the mascot for my school, even if I hate my school (I have numerous shirts from my second high school, to which I never really adjusted)
I own more blue clothes than anything. I like blue, but blue clothes are also easier to match & easier to find
I'm very self-conscious (see here)
I like Aeropostale simply because they were established in 1987, the year I was born. That's why. I like the '87 on everything. :)

Deuces, yo

Worldwide Accent Project- Another VLOG!!!

I forgot to post this last week, when I actually made the video, but I'll go ahead and post it this week. I'm a little embarrassed by the way I look/sound, but it's a contribution to a project, and I figure if I spread the word, more people might participate. Since I have a mediocre readership (but varied and across the world), I figure we could get a lot of accents in there. Have at it! Make your own! It's never too late! Here's mine!

Deuces, yo



Remember, I'm really sensitive right now. Please try to be (at least kind of) nice. Comments are welcome (and appreciated!) xoxo

Lost in Stereo(types)**

When I say "Canada" or "Alaska," what are some of the things that we first think of? Naturally, a lot of the people who don't live there will think of ice or snow. Even though I've never been there, and I know that they don't always have ice and snow, I know it's pretty damn cold up there compared to what it is here, typically.

When people think of Texas, and often other Southern states, they think of heavy, thick accents, horses, tumbleweeds (for Texas in particular), Country, and rednecks. Personally, this gets on my nerves. I know that is sort of a double standard, for me to associate Canada with cold, Aussies with awesome accents, Florida with people who aren't so swift***, Ohio with cheese (and The Blog O' Cheese really helped with that one....!! He's really one of my faves though =P He's awesome), but it's really difficult for me when people stereotype Texas.

It's also difficult for me when people stereotype things that aren't necessarily geographical, like physical or mental issues. People with physical limitations aren't always limited by them. People with mental problems aren't always depressed. People with either problem don't always see it as a problem, and sometimes they're the most functional and successful people in society. A lot of the most successful therapists and counselors have had drug addictions counselors, therapists, or some kind of other problem that a "normal" person would think of as a issue that would hold them back.

The thing is, these things are exactly what push these people push forward, push harder to succeed. The things that may have held me in a state of "oh no, I can't function" are exactly the things that have pushed me to succeed in obtaining a degree in the field of social work. A lot of the guys in the work that I do, they see the things I've said and done, and in the end, the ones that hang in there, some of them have said that they'd like to help others with addictions when they're able to get degrees in the future. Some of the people I work with have histories of their own, stories to tell. Everyone has something that they've overcome, but they don't let their problems define who they are. They let their success define who they are.

These stereotypes, they are a silly thing. We all get caught up in them, and we all get caught up in them at one time or another. People are expected to look, act, or speak a certain way. When people see me, they expect me to be younger than I really am, just because of my appearance. That's a stereotype. If you haven't seen me, you can look at my vlog here. Yes, I look and sound very young, and that's something I have to overcome on a day-to-day basis. I've lived in Texas most of my life. Do I sound Texan? Not really. To foreigners, I sound American. That's about as close as I usually get.

Sometimes, we let stereotypes set in and really define people, and sometimes, they let those stereotypes get to them. They finally start following those groups, and it's unfortunate when they get caught up in something like drugs, addiction, or crime, simply because of their appearance, neighborhood, or family. Somehow, that has to stop. I've seen far too many that are in treatment simply because they live in the wrong place, but they have nowhere else to go. Everyone that lives around them is in the drug culture, and it is really difficult to avoid. There are the types that get caught up in crime because that's the only way that they can afford to live; mom spends their food money elsewhere, and they've got too many kids in the family to go elsewhere. They got framed. They were in the wrong place at the wrong time, and they LOOKED guilty. Looked guilty? Really? It's really unfortunate.

When it comes to this, some of those silly stereotypes, like my accent, become secondary. how can we avoid these children growing up in the wrong environment get involved in a healthier environment, so as to avoid them being involved in any type of environment where they'd be associated with crime or drugs? This was part of one of my papers last year, and is related to an assignment this semester that I'm already brainstorming.

The point is, though, don't let a stereotype define who you are, and definitely don't let it define anyone else. I look much [edit]older YOUNGER (thank you mom for pointing this error out, I do not look older) than I really am. Even though I am about to complete a degree, I've had my own struggles, some of which people might think would keep a person from getting a degree. I'm not rich, despite my locality. I don't have a horse, and have never ridden one to my knowledge, despite living in Texas since 1994. I don't own boots or a hat, although I love my blue jeans. I lack a Texan drawl, and y'all is not a word that is spoken much in my language, unless I'm saying "I usually don't say that word." I'm far from skinny, but it's not from eating greasy hamburgers- aside from my mom's, which she doesn't make often, I cannot tell you the last time I had a hamburger, because it has been quite a while. I am not the stereotypical college student- I took 6 years instead of 4. I don't like iced tea or Dr. Pepper, or even coffee. In fact, I'm starting to have an aversion to soda in general, because none of it has carbonation, thanks to something that I'm taking. Hopefully, it'll help me to lose weight. I am an intern, but I do far more than paperwork. In fact, paperwork is one of the smaller parts of my job. I also love reading. Stereotypes? I don't fit most of them.

A few I do fit: I'm excited about graduation. My favorite color is blue. I like looking nice. I still have my parents, all my grandparents, a brother, and a sister, and live in a house. I'm shy, but I talk a lot when I get to know people. It's easier for me to talk to someone over the internet because I can't see them. I type pretty fast (typically 70-80 wpm, although sometimes it's as low as 60). This is a difficult task. It's hard to find the stereotypes I do fit. Stereotypes are difficult to place people in because they are very rarely true!

Next time you think about putting a person in a stereotype, stop to think about what you know about that stereotype, and instead, ask the person questions about themselves in general. People like to talk about themselves, not their stereotype. A person is themselves, not a product of those around them, and that is an important thing to remember when getting to know them.

Credit here

**This is a reference to the song "Lost in Stereo"
***I was born in Florida. Therefore, in applying this statement, I am also incriminating myself. I am in no way trying to offend anyone, and if I had no ties to Florida, and if I had not been born in Jacksonville, I would not be making that statement

Camera Shy

Camera shy, but....I did a vlog. Yes, a vlog. 20something bloggers, aka 20SB, has declared the 8th of June "Vlog Day," and I wanted to get mine out of the way. I love 20SB, it's a really good site to be connected to; you can find a lot of new blogs there, and network with a lot of people. Since I love them so much, they squeezed a vlog out of me, my first video ever. (I didn't have a device that recorded videos before anyway).

You can make fun of my hair. Or the place where I pick at the skin on my chin. Or my horrible eyeliner, or my hair falling in my face, or the fact that I spent 7 minutes talking about how I like to help people. Or you can just listen, and enjoy the fact that I did something new for you guys (and trust me, this will be rare). I have very bad social anxiety, and me being on camera is one of the most awkward situations you can find me in. Others include while I'm drooling in my sleep and sitting on the toilet.

Please don't laugh at me. I know my speech is a little funny (and I don't mean accent-wise, I mean I just pronounce certain letters differently). I don't have a Texas accent either (really!! honestly!!). Bear in mind that this is a recording from my iPod, so I am holding my iPod and recording at the same time, so the movement is not intentional.

Without further adieu, I will speak to you (hey, that rhymed!) (wow that is a creepy pic of the middle of my face)

This video post is part of 20SB’s Vlog Day and the topic is “Introduce Yourself”…anyone can participate! Details are here.